The best thing in the weekend papers, if you ask me, was Graydon Carter formerly of Vanity Fair, now of some inscrutable online enterprise, talking about his famous Cannes parties and what could go wrong. He said, ‘One year someone came down to tell me that Isabelle Huppert had fainted and might be dead. I went up to see her and she was the colour of asphalt, so I thought she was dead, but then suddenly she came back to life. She hadn’t balanced the food and liquor intakes.'
This is fantastic. Next time you’re found passed out in the gutter and the police pick you up for being drink and incapable, I really think you should say, ‘But officer, I hadn’t balanced my food and liquor intakes.’ What could go wrong?
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